


i'm tired (come rest in my arms)

by flowerpetal275



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Anxious Kozume Kenma, Depressed Kozume Kenma, Dissociation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, KuroKen - Freeform, M/M, Protective Kuroo Tetsurou, Social Anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-14 12:42:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29667486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowerpetal275/pseuds/flowerpetal275
Summary: Kozume Kenma skips practice for the first time, and Kuro Tetsurou is not about to let it slip.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 4
Kudos: 119





	i'm tired (come rest in my arms)

Kozume Kenma was having, as some would call it, a no good, _very_ bad day. 

From the get-go, he knew the day was going to be suck-ish the second he opened his eyes this morning. A headache had been pounding in the back of his skull, his brain seemingly stuffed with what felt like cotton. His thoughts were sluggish, as if they'd been drenched in silly-putty. All in all, the boy felt like he'd been dissociating since the first second he was awake. 

The school day had gone terribly, per Kenma's expectations. 

His anxiety had been getting to him today, with shaky hands and an unease buried deep in his stomach. Every glance, or touch, Kenma wondered how many people had been watching him, criticizing his every move. It was just too much for Kenma's exhausted mind to handle at the moment. 

Kenma's days weren't usually as bad as they were today. Typically, he'd drag himself out of bed and push through, knowing Kuro would be at his side almost every step of the way. 

But for some reason, he just felt detached the entire day; As if the world kept moving around him while he was stewing in his own universe; one of scary thoughts, sweaty palms, and a sprinkle of nausea. 

Kenma's sour mood did not go unnoticed by the boy's best friend and partner, Kuroo Tetsurou. From the second he laid eyes on the short blonde, Kuroo knew something was up. He wasn't sure what, so he just chalked it up to sleep deprivation--Kuroo knew Kenma never got much rest, much to Kuroo's concern. Kuroo would do what he could to ensure his significant other got enough sleep, but by god, the setter was stubborn. 

All in all, Kuroo had decided it was just another bad day for Kenma, and he'd do what he could to help him through it. 

However, what Kuroo hadn't noticed was how distracted he already was. The volleyball captain had two tests today, so unfortunately he hadn't realized how much he'd been neglecting the needs of his boyfriend. 

"Why do you like volleyball?" Kuroo's head shoots up at Kenma's question, the older boy almost dropping his sandwich in shock. 

"Kenma-" Kuroo starts, his eyebrows bunched in confusion, "Do you not like playing?" 

Kenma only shrugs, nudging his rice around with his chopsticks. 

Kuroo was more than alarmed by Kenma's question; He knew Kenma struggled with depression. He would often lose interest in even his video games, and Kuroo would show up at his house to find him lying in the darkness of his curtained room, staring at the ceiling. 

But the one thing Kenma always, without thought, cared for was volleyball. Yes, Kenma hated exercise more than life itself. Yes, Kenma was probably the laziest boy in Japan. But the setter knew how much his best friend loved the sport, so without hesitation, Kenma would love it too. Kuroo did so much for him, the least he could do was share his enthusiasm. 

And Kenma happily did. Sure, he hated having to run laps, and he _oh, so_ hated the feeling of his own sweat on his skin. But nonetheless, Kenma loved watching how excited Kuroo got when they won a game, or even just got to play. It automatically brought a small smile to the blonde's face. 

So when Kuroo realized his boyfriend had been doubting it, he immediately became concerned. "Kenma, is everything okay?" Kuroo asks, overly cognizant of the boy's distant stare into the ether. 

Kenma doesn't answer, only stares into nothingness. Kuroo looks away, lost in his own thoughts now. How could Kuroo help him? 

The lunch bell suddenly rings, urging them to their next lesson. Kuroo silently panics, knowing his best friend needed him right now, but also knowing his chem test was next period--something Kuroo could not afford to skip. 

"Okay, Kenma-" He turns back to his boyfriend, who was now stuffing his full lunch box back into his backpack absentmindedly. "Just hang in there, alright? I'll see you at practice?" 

Kenma only nods, giving a small hum in response. With his eyes downcast, Kenma loops his thumbs around his backpack straps and silently walks into the passing crowd of high schoolers. 

Kuroo internally curses himself--he should do something. He _should've_ done something. However, instead, Kuroo just packs up his empty bento box and makes his way to his chemistry class. 

The last few hours of the school day pass relatively the same as the first, the only difference being Kenma's exhaustion seeming to double ten-fold as the hours dwindle down. 

Before either of them knew it, it was time for practice. 

Kenma, still stuck on auto-pilot, maneuvers his way through the hallways, towards the gym. However, as he approaches the doors, his thoughts crescendo into a fortissimo of noise. He clutches the side of his head, stepping off the sidewalk to lean back against the wall. 

Everything blurs away from him, reality becomes an unfortunate concoction of terrifying emotions and detached senses. 

Kozume Kenma felt, at that moment, completely, totally, and utterly alone. 

Kuroo Tetsurou had already been inside the gym, having been able to walk faster due to his cursed longer legs. After a quick check of Kenma's shut locker, Kuroo realizes the younger boy hadn't been in the club room to change yet. It was already ten past three--where was Kenma? 

Kuroo knew, even if the setter hadn't have been feeling well, he would have let Kuroo know. If anything, the boy would often lie about feeling unwell and end up overexerting himself at practice (to which Kuroo would typically scold him for) (...with love). So, where could he be? 

No messages from him. No calls, either. The captain made his rounds, asking each of his teammates if they'd seen the boy recently. Each one earned him a denial and a worried, "Why? Is he okay?" 

Kuroo found himself unable to place a label on his emotions. Yes, he was worried, of course. But the boy quickly realized just how... _angry_ he was. 

Why? Was he angry at Kenma? For what, skipping practice? 

Yeah, maybe he was. Kuroo knew Kenma lacked many ambitions in his quiet life. Not much got the boy excited, let alone earned him a smile. 

Kuroo had made Kenma promise to stay in volleyball, even if he found that he hated the sport. Kuroo had felt bad for possibly making the younger boy spend his time on something he probably couldn't care less about, but he also knew how lost Kenma would become if he didn't have something to focus his attention on. 

The universe knew that Kozume Kenma would give up if he lost volleyball. 

Because if the gamer lost volleyball, he lost Kuroo. And Kozume Kenma was nothing without Kuroo Tetsurou. 

So, yeah--maybe Kuroo _was_ was a little mad that Kenma gave up on him, even if for only one day. Because Kuroo knew once he skipped one day, Kenma would most likely never come again. 

And Kuroo could, in no way, ever afford to lose his kitten. 

With newfound determination, Kuroo marches out the gym doors, still on the search for the smaller boy. And boy, was he gonna give it to him once he found him. 

What Kuroo wasn't prepared for, however, was one Kozume Kenma curled up in a ball on the sidewalk. Kuroo freezes, despite years of practice in handling Kenma when he's this fragile. "Kenma?" Kuroo asks delicately, his anger dissipating. 

Kenma doesn't reply. 

"Kenma." Kuroo repeats, firmer. He kneels beside the boy, gently laying a heavy hand on his shoulder. "What's wrong, kitten?" 

"I-I don't k-know-" Oh no, he was stuttering. Kenma often stuttered when talking to people, Kuroo knew this. But he also knew he was the only exception; Kenma almost never spoke with a stutter when talking to Kuroo, not unless he was feeling especially anxious. 

"Hey, hey-" Kuroo wraps his arms around the boy, drawing him close to his chest. "It's okay, you don't have to explain." 

Kenma shakes, his hands absently laying in his lap. "I-I feel l-like I'm not here- here..." His breath hitches in this throat. 

Realization strikes Kuro like a cymbal:

Kenma had been dissociating. He wasn't just tired, like usual. Kenma had been stuck in his head since this morning. 

Kuro holds him ever closer to his chest, trying to calm the trembling teen. "You're okay, Kenma, you're right here with me. Here, can you do something for me, kitten?" 

Kenma nods subtly. Kuroo almost smiles--even at his worst, Kenma's still willing to help Kuroo in any way he can. 

"I want you to list off five things you can see, alright?" Kuroo explains, looking down at the lifeless eyes of his boyfriend. 

"O-okay..." He manages, "I-I see the g-grass- grass...and the sch-school...and you." 

"Good job, kitten, you're doing great." Kuroo tries to urge him on, quickly kissing him on the forehead. This earns little to no reaction from the setter. 

"And your uni-uniform, and the sky." Kenma finishes, taking a few deep breaths afterwards. It was hard to talk for so long. 

"I'm proud of you, baby." Kuroo smiles down at him. "Now four things you can feel." They continue on with the other three senses, Kenma slowly getting a bearing of the world around him as they go. 

Kenma finally meets Kuroo's eyes, "T-thank you, Kuro." He was still stuttering, which was never a promising sign. Kuro knew what his boyfriend needed was a hot shower, a good meal, and some heavy rest. 

And by god, Kuroo was going to get Kenma every damn thing he ever needed, even if it meant the death of him. 

The team captain scoops his boyfriend up into his arms, smiling softly when he feels Kenma bury his face in his chest. Kenma was, by far, the cutest thing Kuro has ever, and will ever, encounter in his lifetime. And _that_ was a fact. 

Kuroo sticks his head back into the gym, apologizing to the team and Coach Nekomata for needing to miss practice, and asking Yamamoto to drop off his backpack and clothes at Kenma's house tonight. He carries Kenma home, smiling once more at Kenma's soft breaths.

Kuroo knew Kenma had been dealt a far worse deck than he had ever deserved. It almost seemed as though the universe continued to tie Kenma's string of life in knots, laughing as it watches the thin boy trip and stumble over the makeshift tripwire. All in all, the cosmos did Kenma dirty. 

And Kuroo was always going to be there to pick Kenma back up when he does happen to trip, whenever he occasionally gives up and leaves himself lying on the floor. 

Kuroo was always going to be there to pick Kenma back up.

**Author's Note:**

> comments are much appreciated <3 thanks for the read!


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